Last Supper Gets Super Sized

According to a Cornell University study published in the International Journal of Obesity, food portions in depictions of the Last Supper painted over the past 1,000 years have increased. The study points to increases in the production, availability, safety, abundance and affordability of food.

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$24,000 Gandhi Pen? Makes Perfect Sense

Luxury pen maker, Montblanc, has come under scrutiny for producing a pen with the likeness of the revered Indian spiritual leader Mahatma Gandhi. The gold and silver limited edition pen is said to be contradictory to Gandhi's simple life style. There is currently a court battle to put a stop to the distribution of the $24,000 pen.

Meanwhile the 26-inch Mother Theresa commemorative rims are garnering little if any media attention at all.

No Accounting For Taste

Why would anyone admit to HAVING naked pictures of Greg Oden? Dude looks like one of those old tree-men from Lord Of The Rings


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Thanks A Lot Shaq

It looks like Cleveland Caveliers Center Shaquille O'Neil has taken to leaving the streets strewn with his used condoms. What a disregard for human life and decency!


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New Camouflage For British Soldiers

According to BBC News, British troops in Afghanistan will be updating their uniforms for the first time in 40 years. The new multi-terrain camouflage pattern is said to be more effective in the wide range of Afghani environments. Judging by the image above, the new uniforms are working great!!!

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Gangsta Dolphins

Marine biologist in California have finally discovered why so many porpoises have been washing ashore dead...Gangsta Dolphins.

This is the first time Dolphin-on-Porpoise violence has been recorded. Mobs of dolphins have been seen ramming and drowning Porpoises. One possible explanation for the violence is sexual angst due to the lack of female Dolphins.

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Hind Sight Is 20/20

Tennis superstar Andre Agassi has admitted to using the drug Chrystal Meth in a new book due to come out this November. Looking back, the acid wash tennis shorts and bleach blond mullet should've been a dead giveaway

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Cardinals New Hitting Coach

The St. Louis Cardinals announced today that former Cardinal and Home Run King Mark McGwire would be their new hitting coach next season. Seems to me they could've saved themselves a lot of money by cutting out the middle man.

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Beauty Is In The Eye Of The Beholder

A Saudi man is suing one of his country's largest oil companies for the wrongful death of his prized camel. The devastated camel owner is asking for $250,000 in compensation for his beloved beast who was set to be a contestant in an upcoming camel beauty pageant.

A CAMEL BEAUTY PAGEANT?!? I guess that's the only time having a giant camel toe can help you win anything.

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Out Of This World

This week Nasa Scientists discovered a massive ring around Saturn...and an awful smell around Uranus.

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Dirty Money

A new study has found that US paper money ranks #1 in containing the highest traces of cocaine. Oddly enough, those same notes that contained high traces of cocaine also contained high traces of Darryl Strawberry



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Yao Ming Under Construction

7'6" Houston Rockets center Yao Ming has decided to undergo surgery to repair a stress fracture in his giant foot. The surgery will likely make Yao miss the upcoming NBA season and cause traffic jams in a 30 mile radius of the Toyota Center where the Rockets play their home games.

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Lance Armstrong's Bike Goes Missing

Lance Armstrong's one-of-a-kind bicycle was stolen yesterday after a race in California. Apparently it was taken from one of his team's storage trucks. Fortunately for Lance there was another bike available on the scene for him to use.

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Some NFL Analysis

With my somewhat limited knowledge of football, I can deduct this from the N.Y. Giants 23-11 loss to the Philadelphia Eagles this weekend.

Worst Job EVER

Zookeepers in at Zoo New England say Gigi the Gorilla is doing fine after receiving a colonoscopy earlier this week. The zoo staff ran several tests (including the colonoscopy) to find the cause of the gorilla's digestive problems. The doctor who administered the test is also said to be recovering after hours and hours of hand washing in an effort to get rid of the "gorilla ass" smell.

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Going Up

This week in Japan, an international group of scientists is discussing the possibility of constructing a space elevator. The space elevator would be used to transport people, objects, and even nuclear waste from earth into outer space.

The elevator will also be able to break the world record for longest awkward silence after a small talk conversation.

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What A Way To Go

Yesterday in Brooklyn, a naked, fluorescent light bulb wielding man was killed when cops tried to coax him off a ledge with an electric tazer. How would you feel if this was the last picture that was ever taken of you?

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NOTE: Photobucket deleted the actual picture of this dude, so the above is an artist's rendering

Nice Stroke Tiger!

Today Tiger Woods announced his wife Elin is pregnant with their second child. The image above is a stupid graphic designer's rendering of the moment Tiger Woods first found out the joyous news.

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Mile High Club MUCH Easier To Get Into Now

American Airlines has beaten Delta in the race for Inflight WiFi. This past Tuesday, the airline announced “Today, U.S. air travel changes forever, American Airlines is the first to bring in-flight Internet to the market, and today the days of being cut off from the rest of the world while in the air become history.”

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Scientists Closer To Making Invisibility Cloak

Scientists at The University of California, Berkley have developed a material that can be used in making an invisibility cloak. The material works by bending light rays to mimic objects seen behind it, thus making it appear invisible. I actually got my hands on this top secret material and am watching you read this sentence right...now.

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